Death by Fowl

They say that in Australia, there are more ways to die by an animal than any other country.  It is easy to see why when you take a quick gander onto this site.  You can probably guess how I have become so jumpy!  I have seen my fair share of cane toads, green tree frogs, cockroaches, spiders, lizards and geckos...but this next animal has caught me COMPLETELY by surprise. 

 

Pretty sure this pest belongs on the list!

 I can see you rolling your eyes, especially you Canadians who are used to this little fella:

 

This jovial and simple bird has a joyful song and at times gets confused thinking that it has found its life partner in a piece of tin foil gleaming in the sun.  Silly magpie.

Well the other day I got up early to go for a walk before work.  It was early, and I was tired, but it was a beautifully sunny day.  No more than 50 metres from my house I suddenly felt a breeze as I heard a "flap flap flap" and the gnashing of a beak in my ear.  

Don't be fooled, I did NOT look like the girl in the above photo.  I probably sounded like a cross between a cat being swung around by its tail and a tone deaf opera singer.  These 'sounds' (we'll call them for lack of a better word), were coming out my mouth at the exact time I was karate chopping the air.  I think I even got a high kick up in that routine.  It was the kind of fear where the subconscious took over, and probably made for one impeccable show should someone be peering out their window at that exact moment.  

Well what better than pure adrenaline to get your heart pumping, and that's exactly what it did.  For the rest of the walk I felt like I'd eaten a year's worth of halloween candy and a bottle of caffeine tablets.  The entire time I was on BIRD WATCH, and not the pleasurable kind.  I hate those birds!

 See informational clip below, and note the look in this little bastard's eye at mark 1:29....and Edgar Allan Poe was worried about a raven...

Quite frankly, I don't care where that instinct comes from...it's no excuse for him to start dive bombing my head when I'm trying my darnedest to stay active.   

 

Some people around town who ride their bike a lot find solace in the the"hedgehog-let"-a bike helmet with strategically placed zip ties to act as a variable 'bed of nails' for the swooping mongrel.

 

 They also say that a magpie won't swoop if you are looking at it, which I beg to differ, but in any case you could paste these to the back of your helmet:

I also like the homeade, eco-friendly version

 So what happens if none of these 'conventional' methods will stave off the angry beast.  I guess matters will have to be taken into mine own hands.  Here are a few of my brainstorming ideas:

 

Anyway, I think you get the point.

It didn't take a genius to harness the inspiration for this fascinator....

 

                    

A few projects I've been working on

My best friend Lies, from Belgium just had a sweet baby boy in September and I made her this quilt.  She loves color!

 

 

I also painted our master bedroom.  I am not sure if I like it yet.  I always choose paint color darker than I want.  Oh well, it will do for the next year or so.

 

Also found this 'little' critter on my window.  Thankfully he was OUTSIDE!!

Boringtown

I decided the other day that my hair was thirsty, and it was time to give it a bit of a nutrient fix.  I found a bazillion 'homeade hair masks' with all kinds of ingredients from egg yolks to yogurt to rainbow sprinkles.  Ok, I made the sprinkles part up-but it wasn't too far off of some options.

I gave it a go, and instantly started having flashbacks to being 7 years old, swimming in the Raymond outdoor pool when all my cousins and sisters' hair would turn green in the chlorine!

 

 Here's the concoction I used: 

1 avocado

1/2 c of honey

1 egg yolk

2 TB of olive oil

Sadly, my hair didn't come out like the girl in the Pantene commercials, but maybe it was a little softer and more voluminous than before?

What's in a NAME?

When I was originally dreaming up titles for my blog, I was thinking that I wanted to have a deep and meaningful title.  I would joke around about the compulsion to title them with some ridiculous pun (see each one of my monthly posts!), and wanted to dream up something I thought was funny.  


MEASLEY-BEEK.  What the hell does that mean?  I remember being sad about changing my name when I got married 3 years ago, and tossed up the option of some sort of bastardized hybrid mash up we could both have instead.  A fifty/fifty split, a yin and a yang.  I jokingly came up with M-B, and further screwed around with the idea of the same silly name on my blog.  Well, it STUCK!  People loved it, and it was getting continual laughs when I'd throw it out there as a joke of a suggestion.


Today, once again, a friend reiterated that that is a funny name and would suit my blog.  Her exact words were "it's a comedy blog, the current title just doesn't suit it...it's not YOU".  What a great compliment that at least ONE person finds me funny, besides my sister cousins Becca, Helen or Amy, who pretty much laugh when I sneeze (ok maybe sneezing IS funny if you knew me as a 5 year old...but that is a story for another day...Lindsay Butler!).  


The change over sort of puts the pressure on me to keep things light hearted, and to get my humor across such a one dimensional medium, no?  Oh well...here goes nothing...

Uniformity

The last 2 countries that I have lived in, Wales and Australia, are crazy about their uniforms.  I thought that it was just for school aged kids, which, let me be clear do NOT look like this:

Not that that is a particularly bad thing, but let's just say, brown and yellow, mid-calved dresses, with socks and chunky black business shoes leave a little to be desired.  On the whole however, I have really come around to accepting and agreeing with the concept behind uniforms.  I mean, I sell health insurance and we have a uniform!

I was in full support however, until I was sent out to get a few 'bits and pieces' for my upcoming nursing clinical in November.

First item on the list: navy or white nursing polo

Not bad.

Second item: navy business pants

Given my size this has proven the most difficult, especially since it is a MUST that they are long pants and not any of the other options ("culottes", skirt).  When you see item #3, this will all makes sense.

Third item: black, lace up, non-slip "school shoes".  Otherwise known as the "Zellers special, all black reffing shoe complete with perspiration holes".  I'm going to call them "character building shoes".

Check out these rippers:

I thought the baby dog's would soften the blow.

These kicks are apparently "all the rage" according to the sales associate, which I find hard to believe, but in any case I guess the translation is 'selling like hotcakes' in the nursing world.  Who knows, maybe I will be "cool".  Plus, they are made of kangaroo leather, which has 4 times the strength of cow hide.  I left the shop with one SWEET pair of shoes AND a fun fact.  What a great day.

As for the nursing shoe, they are a particularly abominable breed of hideous.  When I was scouring the web for any other, potentially less ugly options I stumbled upon these gems.  I guess it could be worse...